There's a Twilight Support Group for That
Published February 19, 2010
Dear citizens of reality,
It has come to my attention that in this novel world of Twilight obsession, sparkly Edward dolls, and mass rabid fandom, many of you struggle with feelings of Twi-disorientation, Twi-identity confusion, and even Twi-aloneness.
First, let me say you are NOT alone–whether you LOVE the books, or DETEST them with a strong gag-like reflex. Twilight stirs such passion within the best of us.
Second, I’ve decided to do my part (as the slightly biased, albeit sardonic fan I am) to help bring a bit of sanity to this unnatural force of fantasy.
Hence, my recommended list of Twilight support-groups. Take a gander; then leave us a comment on which one might help in altering your rabid well-being for the betterment of our sanity.
Or perhaps you see here a recommendation for a friend?
And remember, I only suggest these because I care. And the support only truly comes when you admit that you can no longer do this alone.
Ahem…
For the Twi-hard: http://twilightersanonymous.com/
For the Twi-tard: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twilight_(series)
For the Twi-husband: http://twilighthusbandsupportgroup.com/?cat=1
For the Twi-mamma: http://www.twilightmoms.com/
For the Twi-hater: http://nerdfighters.ning.com/forum/topics/1833893:Topic:460922
For the Twi-confused who legitimately believes he/she is an actual vampire: http://sphynxcatvp.nocturna.org/index.html
For the person who legitimately could care less and just wants to get on with life: http://sports.yahoo.com/olympics/vancouver/blog/fourth_place_medal
What’s the mood noise of the moment?
None. Except for this awesome video which, Pro-Twi or AnTwi, you’ve gotta love it.
Tags: Twi-confused, Twi-hard obsession, Twi-hater, Twi-husband, Twi-momma, Twi-tard, Twilight support groups
02.19.2010 / 10:39 am
there should be a warning for pregnant women that at the end of this video there is some regurgitation that happens. Funny? Yes. A little gag reflex inducing? Yes, that too.
02.19.2010 / 10:46 am
Has it really come to this? Spoofing a vampire movie w/ cheeseburgers? Really? REALLY? Also, I don’t think my wife would take being called “spider monkey” as a compliment… it just doesn’t have that ring of romanticism as, say, “honey bun” or “sweet cheeks”.
02.19.2010 / 11:02 am
Is it wrong that my favorite part is the regurgitation?
Sweet cheeks, eh? Hmm… Well, I’ll let you in on a little-known secret. Our first week of marriage my husband took to calling me “Her Royal Hineass.” I’ve worn that title proud on my diva days…and on my others–he wisely forgets to use it.
02.19.2010 / 11:21 am
Anthony, if you call me ANY of those names, I’ll smack you.
And I’m a TwiMom. For sure. I’m so glad that there are others out there that understand.
02.19.2010 / 11:39 am
This morning’s post…
[This morning, I gently settled my set of the Twilight Saga into a box that formerly held Absolut Vanilla Vodka. Mmmm. Two of my favorite things. I started contemplating my Twilight obsession, and I realized that I needed help. I am guilty of neglecting house work, home work and cooking to read. Heck (don’t tell CPS), I’ve even given my kids Benadryl at 6PM so I would have all night to read. I’m so bad! I need a support group!]
02.19.2010 / 3:26 pm
Perhaps I have another category to offer. Check this out: http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2010/february/26.37.html
(Title of article is “There’s Power in the Blood”) Really.
02.19.2010 / 4:21 pm
Well, it appears my spidey senses were tingling, no? ‘Cuz in looking over your comments, Dani and Jeanette, one has to admit the timing of this post is pretty spiffy
. Dani, I’m so glad that I could provide you with vamp support. And thanks for the recommend from your blogpage. (Oh, and your box label mention made me laugh. Quite heartily.) And, Jeanette, that article was interesting. I especially enjoyed Anne Rice’s comments. Thanks for the link! But christians writing about vampires? What IS this world coming to? Oh…ahem…
02.19.2010 / 4:37 pm
HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!! I only get crazy after reading or preparing for a movie. Ask me this question as June comes closer
02.19.2010 / 10:30 pm
Is there a support group for those of us trying to find someone to turn our husbands into a super sexy vampire? For now I will just continue dusting him with sparkle powder when he isn’t looking.
02.20.2010 / 2:39 am
um, no comment… except – funny video!
02.20.2010 / 8:18 am
So then, Bethany, we’ll be sure to remind you of these support options in May, in preparation for Eclipse (which was my favorite of the Twi-books, by the way).
Kristin: You are WAY too funny. Like, I’ve laughed repeatedly over your sparkle powder.
Lisa:
02.20.2010 / 9:24 am
Olympics — forget the book, I really could care less.
02.20.2010 / 7:37 pm
Heheh…that Olympic site (for “the people who could care less and just want to get on with life”) is REALLY funny. Especially the posts they put up each day where they comment on the male ice-skaters’ wardrobes.
01.18.2011 / 7:52 am
Hi there,
I am a psychologist creating a documentary on the Twilight saga (specifically on how it has affected people’s lives/relationships/sexuality in any way). I need to interview people (anonymity is ok if preferred). Please let me know if you or anyone you know would be interested/appropriate for this project. ANY age, location, and demographics is ok (can be done through skype).
Thanks!
Niloo